Ruby's Wish

I used to worry obsessively that my daughter's love of fairy tales and all things princess would skew her view on the world and somehow make her more susceptible to the downfalls of female subservience. I don't think I ever owned a Barbie doll as a child, or at least I don't ever remember asking for one and I distinctly remember being bored to tears when visiting a friend's house in elementary school and being talked into a game of fashion doll dressing. (In fact, the only one I ever owned was a gag gift given to me when I worked for the state and she sat proudly on my desk after I gave her a punk-ska makeover with some scissors and a black Sharpie.) So, when my daughter became obsessed with all things pink and girlie and started asking for Barbies and Disney Princess movies and Cinderella vanities and dressing up in countless combinations of tu-tus, tiaras and "glass" slippers and reciting word for word lines from Snow White....well, let's just say I was baffled (and somewhat horrified). Everyone had warned me that it would happen sooner or later, that I wouldn't be able to keep Barbie at bay forever; but I was sure that my daughter would never want such things.
How very wrong was I.
Keeping in mind that she is only five(going on 25), I held on to the hope that "this too shall pass" and started trying to find the positive messages in the endless stories of 16 year old maidens being married off to their princely saviors despite the desperate attempts of their evil female authority figures. Oy.
Then one night a couple of weeks ago, I was lying in her bed reading a book that we've read several times before. It was a gift from my sister and is called "Ruby's Wish". It is the story of a young girl growing up in old China on an estate owned by her grandfather(who, like other wealthy men in China at the time, had several wives). He hires a teacher for his many grandchildren and while the girls drop out of lessons one by one to focus on learning domestic skills, Ruby continues her schooling and dreams of going to university like the boys rather than being married and sent away to live with her husband as is the tradition for all girls at the time. As it turns out, her grandfather notices her hard work and dedication and learns of her desire to go to school and makes it happen for her. Ruby gets her wish. It is a true story written by Ruby's granddaughter, Shirin Yim Bridges.
Like I said, this was not the first time we had read the story together, but something magical happened for me this time. Maia made a comment about how glad she was that she wasn't a Chinese girl because she loved going to school and wouldn't want to have to go away and live with a boy. I, of course, had to mention that it was not that long ago in our very own country that women were treated as less than men and that many people believed (and still do) that women should only be allowed to stay home and take care of their husbands and their children. "Well, that's just silly," she said. And with those four simple words, my heart went pitter patter and I secretly jumped for joy in my head.
I still have to play "the wicked stepmother" when she dresses up as Cinderella and she still gravitates toward everything pink and sparkly, but I no longer worry obsessively...at least not about that.